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Brochure Critque

j Paul

PFG, Picture Framing God
OK! Now that I am a little further along I though I would start a new thread for more exposure/opinions. Let me know the good, the bad & the ugly! Brochure is still in the playing around with it stage. What do you think? Some had said not to be too wordy, use lot of pictures. Is it picture overload?What about content?It is a tri-fold. So you are looking at PG 1 - 6.Still have to develop content for pg 5 ?


 
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Doug Gemmell

SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer
Move?

I'd move the part about the Viz software in P. 6 to P. 5 to tie it together with the software mention above it in P. 2.

Looks good though!

What are you thinking about putting in P. 5?
 

EllenAtHowards

PFG, Picture Framing God
The only thing I see missing is white space. That is to say that there is no place for the eye to rest, which quickly leads to information overload. I'd say no more than three pictures on each page... (page 5 has lots of white space, though... hehehe)
 

JPete

<span style="color: red"><b><i>Charter Member</i><
I agree with Ellen about the white space. Too much to digest. You should have flow or composition like a good painting.

I am assuming page five is for address to mail.

A good start.
 

DawnStendin

MGF, Master Grumble Framer
I was thinking the same thing...but didn't wanna be first to say it.

I think as far as the technology goes it doesn't hurt to put a little out there and make em wonder about the rest...tease em a little....you can explain it all in great detail when they come in.

I really like the pics on the cover. A nice array of ideas for them to kick around.

Just my .02
 

j Paul

PFG, Picture Framing God
Ok, less is more (even though Less doesn't seem to be around much anymore)

Keep in mind though, that the brochure when folded together is meant to be viewed one page at a time. So when you view the 3 spread it definitely is busy looking I agree!

So if fewer pictures should be used, does that mean verbiage can increase, or stay the same?


What do you think is missing?
 

chile verde

True Grumbler
Try thinking of a trifold brochure like a set of Japanese panel paintings. Each panel should stand on its own, but each should form part of a larger whole.

The cover panel should identify your business and be eye catching enough to make the customer want to pick it up in the first place. If it were my brochure, I would put the name of the shop on top, and the LIFE message on the bottom. As it is, I had to search to be sure of your identity.

Brochures are relatively inexpensive. You have enough material on this one for at least three brochures. Why not start with a general brochure that lists your services and add additional brochures for specialties such as photo restoration and visualization software? As it is, this feels like those old radio ads where the guy talksreallyfasttogetasmanywordsintoa30secondspot as possible.

Wide mats and white space have value for very similar reasons. Imagine a frame around each of the panels shown and I'm pretty sure you would be recommending "wider mats," i.e., more white space.

The inside 3-panel can be designed as one large layout to give you a bit more flexibility in laying out things and placing text without losing space to the gutters between panels. It's really cool when you can make the inside left third go with the outside back third so they are harmonious when the brochure is first opened to be two panels wide and those pages are momentarily side by side. If the inside is three separate panels, then lay them out as a group so the eye is drawn from one point to another--just as you would do when arranging art on the wall.

LIFE is a good message but I think probably twice in the large size and once in the small size would be enough for the whole brochure and would give you white space or space for other things.

The last page is for your close, and I'd put the name of the shop on the bottom of that one, as you have. When laying out the brochure for printing, it's interesting to note that the cover and the back go side by side and they are what the customer would see if they just turn the brochure over without opening it. It's nice if you have a complete message in those two panels. Imagine your first and sixth pages side by side and notice how if you put your shop name at the top of the first and the bottom of the last, you can put an eye-catcher and a sales pitch in between them to get your message out with even a cursory look by the customer.

And maybe work a bit with the fonts. Sans-serif are good for headlines and headings, but you may achieve a slightly classier look if you go to a serif font for any paragraph long description or narrative. Because a tri-fold is narrow to begin with, maybe a slightly less blocky font would also help. You don't want the piece to look like the Hulk shredding another shirt.
 

Paul Cascio

SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer
Wow, Chili. That was extremely informative and very well stated. Nice analysis. Creating a brochure is a lot tougher than it looks, but when it's done, a good one can also double as a direct mail piece too.

What are your thoughts on the color choices?
 

Bill Henry-

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
It’s a great, eye catching design!

In addition to the spelling error – unless you are really selling “girts”– I would suggest that you make the “POP!” in “Make Your Pictures POP!” stand out a little more. Maybe, muting the colors in “Make Your Pictures” might help. And, maybe, by creating a glow behind “POP!” that it would make it more distinguishable.

Also, I find that in your LIFE tag line, having the “raming” so far to the right of the “F” is a little distracting.



I would suggest moving it so it falls a little under the “F”. I don’t think a simple change in kerning would do it, you might have to cut the “raming Expert” from the line of text and physically move it to the left a bit.



But, all in all, it is one of the most attractive designs I’ve seen for a brochure.
 

Rozmataz

SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer
Alot to digest... and to work from the bottom up:

Bill's suggestion, I would split the difference - move "raming" a little closer to the "F" but not under it...

As far as white space - needs more of it!!! Utilize a 1/4" to 3/8" border on the pages. The inside of the brochure of the 3 pages could be designed to be viewed as one - still keeping in mind the fold lines but have it flow from one to the other - as opposed to 3 separate pages as referenced above. Although I seem to design in a grid like you have done as well!

Page 5: Back Panel - for addressing, utilize that for a short message as well as return address to use as self mailer!?

The only other thing is the type style/color. The style and color is extremely bold and very bright and the red/blue may fight with each other. I am distracted by the size and color and have to read twice to get the "message"...

I think it is a good piece!! Go for it!

Roz
 

j Paul

PFG, Picture Framing God
Keep it up guys, I'm listening!
Good point Bill on the spacing, I need to play around with that. On my TV spot (which you can see on page 2) the spacing was corrected by the editor.

All just prelimanry, will take all opinons into consideration.

My logo and colors are what they are (my actual outdoor sign) so they are not subject to change and everything has to work with that. I always thought the opinion was that you should you should have 1 font for headline and 1 font for body, that too many fonts are confusing.
 

Paul Cascio

SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer
JP - Just looked at your website. Your signage looks great. Have you thought about putting your tv commercial on the website?
 

Bill Henry-

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
JP,

There is a guy I used, Dave Doherty, from Beacon Digital Video who converted my cable TV spots from whatever the format they used to both QuickTime and Windows .wmv formats so I could plunk them on my web site.

I was reluctant to send the actual DVD to him, but he has an FTP site that you can upload the video as long as you have broadband. Once they’re finished he can download them the same way.

Two years ago, the cost for the translation was $40 for each format.
 

Paul Cascio

SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer
What format are they in? I may be able to do it for you at no cost.
 

chile verde

True Grumbler
My logo and colors are what they are (my actual outdoor sign) so they are not subject to change and everything has to work with that. I always thought the opinion was that you should you should have 1 font for headline and 1 font for body, that too many fonts are confusing.
Agreed. The fonts should work with the logo. On this version, though, I think they overpower your logo. If it were my brochure, I'd make sure the logo was the brightest element on the page and the type was at least a little subordinate. Your logo is your identity and your money maker--don't bury it.

You wouldn't have to change the colors, but maybe if you chose a less B L O C K Y font, that would help.

Yes, one "font" (actually font family, see wikepedia for technical discussion) for the headlines (can also be used in smaller point sizes as headers, bullet points and call-outs) and a second for the body is a useable rule of thumb--e.g., Arial for the headlines and Times for the body. In a small piece such as this without a lot of text, you can probably just use one "font" for everything and vary the point sizes.

Either way, you need to be consistent. You have used one sans-serif "font" throughout most of the brochure, but on the last page where you say "Bring all your important projects to..." you switch to a serif font, and again, your url at the bottom is also a serif font.
 

j Paul

PFG, Picture Framing God
Some Revisions

I have made some revisions based on some of the suggestions. This is still a work in progress and you are viewing low-resolution images. I will list some of the changes made, as well as some things that can't change. I continue to welcome your review and suggestions.
  • Layout has changed so it works as a Tri-fold.
  • I have changed the Headlines to a less bold font / Times TUR
  • The body text is Times
  • I have re-worked the LIFE logo so spacing is better
  • I have rearranged/sized some things for a little more white space.
  • Inside tri-panel now features one box with the elements of custom framing / photo restoration / art & gifts - all on one inside page.
  • At this time, this brochure is "general to all we do" , at a latter date I might add, individual brochures for specific products.
  • My Logo can not change, thus colors for other items, need to play off of it.
A little hard to view when it isn't folded. Bring Your Art = Front Cover
Award Winning is Right Flap that fold to inside
Latest Tech = Back Cover
Inside Panels Read as Shown


You view the outside cover / Open to Custom Framing -Award Winning / Full Open to Custom Framing - Photo Restoration - Gifts & Art / Back Cover
 

Framar

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
The LIFE thing is getting better but I don't think the spacing is kwite there yet. And i cannot think of any fixes for you wither - sorry!

On the page that starts Award Winning - maybe instead of that list of items (is the public is that dumb that they need a list?) - why don't you put your award winning items on that same page with a brief description of who you won the awards from and the significance therein. I realize you have actually won real industry awards but just simply stating "Award Winning" could also mean the county fair.

Also - that "As seen on TV" picture - isn't that copyrighted for use on actual "As seen of TV" items (ie, infomercial Bass-O-Matic type items) - or has frame visualization software been sold by those types of ads - I think that reference cheapens your presentation.

But overall it is looking very good - you have been very busy!!!
 

j Paul

PFG, Picture Framing God
Also - that "As seen on TV" picture
That picture is an actual "screen shot" from out TV commercial.


As far as providing a list of types of things we frame, what do you all think?

Do people know? Or do we need to tell them? I get people asking (while standing in my shop full of framed models) as well as calling on the phone, asking if we frame, "this or that" I mean no disprespect but some times people are dumb or at least act in a dumb way. I even have people come in and ask me if we do "framing" despite the full wall of corner sample, etc.
 

Framar

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
I dunno - that "As seen on TV" slogan, whilst true in your case since it is a screen shot from your own ad, doesn't it still have a low class kinda feel - items sold in infomercials are usually carp - Gucci (insert current designer name) doesn't sell their stuff on informercials.

How about just saying "We frame anything" with photos of samples. God - I hate to think that the buying public would be that stupid - I used to have a brochure with "We frame anything from A to Z" with a list covering both realistic and humorous suggestions (only one that comes to mind is "Wedding pictures and Wombats") - it's kinda the same thing with YP ads - everyone has identical lists - "wow, looky that, ma - that frame shop has mats and frames and, why, even glass!!!"
 

Framar

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
Oh, OK - now I get it - the As Seen on TV thing is part of your commercial - I thought it was something you pasted on top of the screen shot for the brochure.

As Roseanne Rosanna Danna would say, "Never mind."
 

Framar

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
Ooh! Ooh! I like the gallery name at the top - but maybe it would be more cohesive if you used the same technique of either shadow or outline and not both - pick one!!! (I'd pick outline, myself!!!) (like your bottom example - only upsidedown!!!)

I would also eliminate a bit of the white space between "memories to... (and)...LIFE" - and try making the "Bring your art" a slightly smaller version of the font (yet still larger than the second line). Is there a middle size between line one and line two???

Maybe I'm getting nit-picky now but the "g" in "Bring" hanging down onto the "d and M" in the second line also bothers me. Different font sizes might alleviate that problem.

Hey...you asked!
 

JFeig

SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer
What is more important to a customer to read:
(if I am looking at the latest version)

LIFE - listed 3 times in your brochure

or

The name and address of your business - listed 2 times
 

juiev

True Grumbler
It is looking really good on all the pages, I like the wording layout Bring your Art but the other two lines are not doing it for me - yet..I think you can do better, not sure what...how about using the same font as your business name for the LIFE..The "F" would blend in as well and not be blocky ..

Anyway, now thats is nearly finished could I use at as well down under ?? of course I will change the store name ;)
:D



Torqoz
 

juiev

True Grumbler
Just laughing to myself :nuts:

I am so glad we are not all in the same room trying to help you to do this!! We could all end up fighting :######:

Torqoz
 

Framar

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
Another thought: a huge percentage of these brochures will simply end up in the garbage - no matter how much blood, sweat and tears you pour into their creation -

- but I do like the idea of using the same font for the name and the LIFE. And I do agree that your gallery contact info should be readily findable amidst the hoopla.

Carry on!
 

Dave

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
Paul, I'm jumping in at the end of all this and you should be commended for doing a nice job on the brochure.

I have to admit though that as much as I like the LIFE concept I don't like the logo. It's distracting and not graphically pleasing to my eyes. I also think that the graphics make it hard to read and for the consumer to grasp.

An approach I might suggest would be to use L.I.F.E. as an acronym and underneath in smaller letters spell out the Local Independent Framing Expert.

I can't do it well graphically here, but ...


L.I.F.E.
Local Independent Framing Expert




I don't have Quark on this computer and within this forum I can't adjust kerning or do fractional point sizes, but I would make the length of the two lines the same and bring up the tag line ever so slightly to form an imaginary rectangular box.


Also, I agree with nixing the "As seen on TV" emblem ...I keep looking for a Vegematic or Juicer ...

Overall the brochure is great though and I applaude you!

Just my two bits...
 

Framar

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
Aha - you are on to something there Dave - and jpaul - can you can the shadowing??? That somehow really bothers me (maybe because it makes me think I need cataract surgery again?)

I would also try to make the periods smaller than the ones that come with the font size - and you can't have the period after the E just hanging out in space.

Sorry - you wanted a break and here we are dragging you back to the old drawing table!!! Oops!
 

Garnetta

CGF II, Certified Grumble Framer Level 2
Here are a couple of simple solutions. The first one is using the extremely horizontal shape you started with. Sometimes extreme horizontals are difficult to design around....hence solution #2.




You might consider patronizing a local designer to help with your brochure. It can make a world of difference if you go to an expert. ;)
 

Dave

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
I like Garnetta's first one. I think the tag line needs to be on one line to be read easier.

Tweeking typestyles, etc. will get you there.

I also agree with nixing the shadowing ...it's more difficult to read especially when using a small logo.
 

j Paul

PFG, Picture Framing God
For your review!

Garnetta, good idea, dropping the period after the E. When Framar said I couldn't just leave it hanging out there, I wondered what to do with it.

As far as patronizing a local graphic expert, I wondered how long it would take for someone to throw the, "it's only four sticks of wood" argument back at me. Thanks though, I know what you are trying to say.

Most framers are:
  1. Poor
  2. Creative
  3. Poor
I do intend on taking my ideas to a local printer when they are finalized, however.

Here are a few more layouts for LIFE. I know which of this batch I think is best, what do you all think?

 

Dave

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
#2, #4, #8 or #12

Numbering down each column.

:popc:

I like. Easily read and graphically tight.
 

Garnetta

CGF II, Certified Grumble Framer Level 2
Think White Space!

J Paul, you need to think "white space!" Your brochures are still very cluttered with no hierchy to lead your eye. The same is true with what you've done to the LIFE graphic. BIGGER BOLDER does not always mean better. Everything is screaming for attention at the same time. Give it some air to breathe and draw attention.

I definitely wouldn't reverse the type out....you'll lose it altogther at smaller sizes. Also nix the red type on the blue box. Imagine someone who is color blind being able to read that.

I still believe my examples are a better use of attention using more white space and less screaming.

Just my .02 worth.
 

Garnetta

CGF II, Certified Grumble Framer Level 2
Just a thought....

You know, J Paul, I have a BFA degree in Commercial Art and graduated Summa Cum Laude. That's my main career and I have an art gallery and framing shop I co-own....on the side. : )

Anywho...... I think you should use your creativity and find a good commercial artist locally and barter! Like say.....a kick-@$s brochure design and/or printing in trade for some kick-@$s framing! :beer:

: )

Your brochure may be the first impression you make on a potential customer. I think you should make it a good impression. If you spend a little more to do a job that makes you look professional, you'll make more $$$ in return.

Okay....I'll get off my soap box now. <giggle> I'm just trying to be helpful.

:soapbox:
 

j Paul

PFG, Picture Framing God
I am listening...

Again I want to to thank everyone for their input, I know it takes time to actually put your thoughts into words and post them.
I have and continue to make some of the changes, suggested. Some suggestions I don't necessarily agree with, or an unable to implement for one reason or another, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate them. More changes will no doubt follow.
Still as I said a work in progress and these are low resolution images.

If you don't like the whole thing, I understand, but maybe you could critque each page, which might be more helpful, regrading white space.
FRONT COVER:


BACK COVER:

RIGHT FLAP:

INSIDE:
 

Dave

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
Front Cover:

Just a little crowded at the bottom. The weight of the LIFE logo and preceding tag line is slightly more dominant than your logo at the top of the page.

Might consider reducing overall size of the bottom LIFE and preceding line to allow for less dominance and a little more white space.

MIDDLE:

Drop the "You should bring..." and just say "Bring..." will allow more white space, eliminate excess verbiage and puts forth a call for action.

Also drop the "With the..." to just "The latest technology and design skills" Same reasons.



Might suggest changing second paragraph to :

Your designer will accurately ...

And third paragraph to:

Assures that your mat choices are cut flawlessly
for timely completion of your framing project.

Too much use of the word "allows" as it is.

Back Cover:

I would break up the long listing of types of work you take in by combining some on the same line separating with bullets and/or eliminating a few of them and then grouping into "paragraphs" with white space between them.

The way it is listed, it is difficult and uninviting for a reader to actually read the list.

Compare this thought to how difficult it is to read a run on paragraph without any break ups.

I find my eyes just run down the page with the way it is and I don't stop to read anything.



Or, in lieu of a list, do a well worded paragraph about preservation framing and the knowledgeable staff you have to properly handle any work brought to you.


Take it for what it's worth ...

:shrug:

Overall, Paul, I think it's the Bee's Knees!


 

j Paul

PFG, Picture Framing God
Some of your suggestion Dave!



Opps, I see the error in the 2nd parg. didn't look closely enough when I deleted some of the wording you suggested Dave. Will correct that next time around.


and while I am at it, here is front and back oF Business Card




Now I've got to get some work done for the rest of the day. Really appreciate your ideas.
 
Last edited:

Dave

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
I like much better ...

:popc:
 

Dave

SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God
jP ...clear your message box ...it's full and I can't send anything to you!

:(
 
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