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Discussion in 'Picture Framing Business Issues' started by Ray Bragg, Jul 12, 2010.

  1. Ray Bragg

    Ray Bragg CGF II, Certified Grumble Framer Level 2

    What has happened to manners in American society. I just had someone come in wanting me to apprase 15 oil paintings he had in the car. We do not do apprasals and I told him so. The thing that bothered me was that the whole time he was seeking free apprasals he was eating a ham sandwich, a whole sandwich. Trying to talk and continuing to eat. He could have left it in the car or finished it before he came in. He smelled to high heaven of body oder and cigarettes. People just don't have commen manners any more.
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  2. howdytex

    howdytex MGF, Master Grumble Framer

    what happened to the english language?
    american english is my second language and i am astonished at how poorly the general population can speak english.

    what happened to please, thank you, yes sir, no sir, etc. etc.

    whats with all the lousy drivers?

    why does everyone have a sense of entitlement to something that they want or "need"

    why can't the freaking illegals get shipped out of the country?
    i had to go through the proper channels why can't they?

    the answer is unknown to myself and many others in this world.
    the hard truth is very few people hold themselves accountable for what the do. "we are victims of our society" yeah right. grow up

    this how i feel :bdh:
  3. MaJa

    MaJa SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    And don't get me started on cell phones!!

    You come into my business ... start talking to me ... then take a phone call in the middle!?!? OR, come in on the phone!! What am I to do? Stand there and look at you??

    And in restaurants!?!?! Some day there will be asking us, "would you like to sit in the cell phone or non-cell phone section?"
  4. imaluma

    imaluma SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    Unfortunately a lot of us just weren't taught basic etiquette. I have a few books of etiquette in my collection from the twenties through fifties and I have flipped through them and applied a lot of what I learned to writing letters, phone calls, and generally dealing with customers. I have found that even when the customers are not so conscientious the little bit I have learned goes a long, long, way.
  5. Frame Maker SA

    Frame Maker SA CGF, Certified Grumble Framer

    Ugh, I both love and hate cell phones at the same time, drives me nuts when someone comes in the store gabbing away with some device stuck in there ear.

    For me, the place where manners have completely died is the grocery store. Quick example. I am in line, woman in front of me takes her items out of her basket, turns her back on the basket, finishes her transaction and walks away with the basket left in front of me. I could not believe it. I was furious, but I asked her in a calm voice "excuse me mame, do you need this?" "nope" she said. I wanted to run her over with it.
  6. PaulSF

    PaulSF PFG, Picture Framing God

    On one of the radio morning shows last week, they devoted the entire morning to griping about people in line -- namely, people who cut in line, or who deputize someone to wait in the grocery store checkout line while they do the shopping, etc. It was hilarious!
  7. MaJa

    MaJa SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    "deputize someone to wait in the grocery store checkout"

    Oh ... that's funny!!

    I've actually thought about doing that ... the lines are SO LONG, lol. But I actually feel I do have manners (maybe not 100%, but better then most) and refuse.

    I even bring a cart from the parking lot on my way in. And when I leave I either bring it back to the store or put it in the cart holder, not just left in the parking lot!

    Okay ... I have jumped it onto the side walk if it's raining ... :eek: But I always feel bad!
  8. couture's gallery

    couture's gallery PFG, Picture Framing God

    We don't need no stinkin manners at the grocery checkout...it's every man for himself.

    Same with driving on Florida roads

    and we are entitled to be rude to everyone

    ( all of this is green , by the way I just can't find my green thingy )
  9. cvm

    cvm PFG, Picture Framing God

    Down here in FL every line seems to have one of those guys who 'practices his golf swing' while waiting in line. It used to bug me, but now when I see someone doing it, I just start shadowboxing, tossing faux left hooks and right crosses their way.
  10. PaulSF

    PaulSF PFG, Picture Framing God

    There's always one shmukk who forgets an item and has to run back for it, but when someone is there ahead of you with two things, and then their wife/husband/whatever jumps in with a full cart, that's just out of control.

    There's one cashier at my local grocery who has a 'no cellphone' policy. She simply won't ring up your groceries until you hang up the phone. She's my hero!
  11. PaulSF

    PaulSF PFG, Picture Framing God

    I hate the people who grab a table in a crowded coffee house while someone else in their group waits in line (behind me!!!!) to place the order. My attitude used to be that you aren't entitled to a table until you hand money to the cashier, but now I just fight fire with fire.
  12. Dave

    Dave SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God

    Taking it to a whole new level, I cannot believe the language people use even in front of women and children. I call them on it.

    I've been known to catch the name of a teenage offender in their conversation and tell the group to watch their language as there are ladies (or children) present and ... "by the way, Mikey... tell your mother I said hello!".

    The look on "Mikey's" face is usually quite shocked!
  13. FramerDave

    FramerDave PFG, Picture Framing God

    It seems that people just don't have the grace to be embarrassed any more.
  14. i-m-chickie

    i-m-chickie SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    I can't believe the ham sandwich...didn't even offer you any!

    I was eating at the counter (my lunch) a bowl of Ranier cherries, Buy one quart get a quart free this week at Publix! YUM!
    Fella walks in for framing and I am embarrassed, and sticky fingered...I excuse myself to wash my offending digits but offer him some, because it is polite, and this cherries are DIVINE....he accepted and I sold he a whole bunch of framing! ANd he went straight to Publix after!
    Etiquette wins. And Ranier cherries are divine!
  15. 7717deb

    7717deb Grumbler

    I had one of my frame reps come in yesterday - hadn't seen anyone from the company for at over a year , and she had her cell on, and answered it 3 times while I stood there waiting to see the new mouldings. I don't understand why they don't leave it in the car and let it go to voice messaging. Do they not realize how rude it is, or consider that I have a lot more to do then stand there waiting for them to finish.
  16. shopmonkey cpf

    shopmonkey cpf CGF II, Certified Grumble Framer Level 2

    coupla pet peeves: waiting in freeway onramp, some people just drive over the curb/shoulder and into the freeway flow---like sayin, "oh, i need to get somewhere faster than you"----UGH!!
    also, people who display foul bumper stickers for everyone to see, like, "FU*% the world" type messages. i have a 7 yr old daughter! i dont need her seein that.
  17. pwalters

    pwalters SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    Just sit down with them next time and enjoy yourself. Pretend they were holding it for you and thank them for it.
  18. Rebecca

    Rebecca SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    Awwww. I am the most impatient person in the world, but since I moved to the sunshine coast (ferry ride from Vancouver) I have entered a world of happy, polite, unrushed people. It is a pleasure, and one that I never expected to find. It changed me back into the nice person I once was ;)
  19. shayla

    shayla WOW Framer

    Lovin' that post, Rebecca. :smiley:
  20. dougj

    dougj SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    We actually have people come into the Gallery, stand in the front and carry on a conversation and leave without even looking at the Art, or responding to our HELLO, HOW ARE YOU TODAY.
    We put a screen saver on our second monitor for our IF
  21. shayla

    shayla WOW Framer

  22. Keith L Hewitt

    Keith L Hewitt SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

  23. Rick Granick

    Rick Granick SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God

    That might make you feel better, Doug, but "negative" signage in a retail environment- particularly a personal-service-oriented one- is generally a bad idea. Most people are not offenders, and it projects a "guilty until proven innocent" attitude.
    :kaffeetrinker_2: Rick
  24. Framing:

    Framing: In Corner

    Caught someone out great on a flight in Europe last week.

    As I was trying to get a seat (no pre booked seats with RyanAir) I asked this lady if the seat she had her bag on was taken!!!, she said yes that her other child was on the way, there was already a child with her.

    Anyway as it turned out the air steward asked me to move back to where she was seated and take the seat on across the isle from her, there was a child in that row also, as I started to sit down the child in the row I was in jumped across and pushed the woman’s bag of the seat beside her that was empty and sat in it, she became very embarrassed and had to move out a seat and sit in the isle seat across from me (think very red embarrassed face at this stage)

    What a witch she was trying to hog five seats for only three people, my wife who was now in the seat in front of me, looked back at me and in quite an loud voice so all around us could hear and said to me “I see someone was hogging seats, using their child to try that is lower than low”, needless to say the body language of the woman trying to hog seats was very uncomfortable for the flight.
  25. dougj

    dougj SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    It sure does make me feel better!!
    It only comes on ( when I push the button) for the offenders who think I have nothing better to do than listen to their yacking. If you do not have the courtesy to acknowledge my greeting or respond when asked if you would like some assistance then get your ill mannered rude A$$ out.
  26. nikfrz

    nikfrz SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    Had a young man come in last week, standing at the front door with a go box from the restaurant next door, and yaking on his phone. Loud conversation....

    I give it a few minutes, and then walk up to him and ask if I can help him. He just shakes his head and continues to yell into the phone. That's when I opened the door.

    He was beyond rude!!
  27. Grey Owl

    Grey Owl SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    I was in a restaurant a few months ago, and two sales people were on their cell phone talking to a customer. Everyone in the restaurant could hear the conversation because it was on speaker.

    After a few minutes, I went over to the booth, and said something to the effect, into their phone: "Hi Jill, you don't know me, but everyone in this restaurant knows you because the sales people you are talking to have your conversation on speaker so about 40 of us now know all about you, and we are sorry to hear your sales are down 15%, but these sales people don't seem to care, because they want everyone to know how bad your business is. Well, nice talking to you Jill, take care."

    As I walked away I heard Jill on the phone say "who was that", they replied they didn't know but they thought they better talk somewhere else a little more private."
  28. Framar

    Framar SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God

    It seems to me that when people take on owning and using a cell phone they lose part of their brain function.

    My SIL was enraged almost to the point of going over to a stranger's table at a restaurant to beat the guy up because he was taking phone calls and talking in a crowded restaurant.

    This was BEFORE she owned her own cell phone.

    Now she calls me from stores, check out counters, while she is driving.

    My only defense is to keep repeating loudly, "What? Hello? Hello? Are you there? I can't hear you!"


    Pin drop my butt.
  29. David N Waldmann

    David N Waldmann SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    Wow. What I wish I had the guts for but probably will never do...


  30. wpfay

    wpfay Angry Badger

    Was in a fish shack a couple years ago when the Nextel 2-ways cell phones were popular among contractors. A fish shack really doesn't require a lot of social skills, but one of the workers at the next table had one of these phones and it made that loud sound that there was an incoming. "Hey Tony, where the @*#$ are you?" so the whole restaurant could hear.
    Tony was nonplussed, even though he never realized it. He responded that he was at lunch with the device doing its loud chirp between each sentence. He thought that he was being entertaining.

    I was brought up in a fairly structured home. Dad was a Connecticut Yankee and Mom was a Southern Belle...both were social conservatives. I couldn't count the number of times I had my elbow flicked (and she was fast and it hurt) at the dinner table, or the countless corrections (Yes sir, or yes ma'am, not yeah) and adjustments (stand up straight, put your shoulders back, don't slouch in that chair!).

    In the past 2 days I have witnessed a new to me phenomena in rudeness. Women drivers (3 all told) who deliberately ran stop signs. I don't mean a California rolling stop, I mean no brakes and not much steering...all on cell phones. They are probably the same ones that think that the laws of averages are suspended in Las Vegas just for them, and that they are invisible while having an affair.
  31. framelady64

    framelady64 SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    It has become an all about me world.People have forgotten common courtesy.We went to eat dinner last night at a nice restaurant.The hostess led us to our table without saying a word and than tossed our menus on the table without ever acknowledging us.The waitress apologized and said the girl was having a bad day.I said than maybe you should send her home to adjust her attitude.
  32. Rick Granick

    Rick Granick SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God

    Great story, Russ. You should receive some kind of award for your brave and creative actions.
    :cool: Rick
  33. D_Derbonne

    D_Derbonne PFG, Picture Framing God

    My upbringing was similar to Wally's. I'm a product of two Southern parents and Dad was an Army officer...there was definitely structure.

    "Yes, ma'am!", "No, sir", "Stand up straight!" I had to go to bed at 8 o'clock as a kid. There were no video games, computers...we had one tv set and it was black and white.

    Folks spoke to each other in a store because they had no choice. There was no cell phone to attach to the ear...no easy way to tune your surroundings out.

    I think that our technologically advance society is disconnecting us from others.

    I read a book back in the 70's by Alvin Toffler, "Future Shock."
    It was about how technology and the acceleration of change would effect us as a society.
    We are living it.
  34. imaluma

    imaluma SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    I simply can't understand why people have a problem with cell phone conversations being carried on in stores, restaurants, buses, etc. when it's perfectly ok for two people to speak to each other in these same public spaces. As long as you are not taking calls while the waitress is taking your order or checking out at the grocery store really what's the big deal?
  35. blackiris

    blackiris SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God

    WHOOOOOT !! I agree Sarah!
  36. Dave

    Dave SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God

    I normally have no problem with cell phone calls.
  37. framah

    framah PFG, Picture Framing God

    Seems that everyone who talks on a cell phone thinks they have to yell into it to be heard. That isn't the case with 2 people standing next to each other talking.

    I'm seriously thinking of buying a portable cell phone jammer or maybe a plug in one for the store and one for the car that will jam signals of other people in their cars around me.
  38. Paul N

    Paul N In Corner

    People think that just because the cell phone is so small, they have to yell to be heard.

    One could easily whisper and yet still be heard on the other end.

    Go ahead try it!
  39. MabSadie2

    MabSadie2 PFG, Picture Framing God

    I agree, that's my beef with cell phone users. They don't even notice it, but many of them are speaking very very loudly. Especially in restaurants where there is a lot of background noise that the speaker assumes is drowning them out.

    Another pet peeve. I hate being put on speakerphone. I simply cannot hear what the person on the other line is saying. They sound like they are underwater and the line sounds like it's gone dead when they aren't talking.
  40. imaluma

    imaluma SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    I've overheard some pretty loud conversations and wondered why all the shouting when the person you're talking to is less than two feet away. It's not just cell phone users. It's people in general. I think the reason cell phone users get pointed out is that their one sided conversations don't blend into background noise so much because the start and stop of their speaking is more noticeable.

    That's my theory and I am sticking to it.
  41. Paul N

    Paul N In Corner

    Once on Metro North train (out of NY City heading north) this shar.... I mean lawyer..... was dictating to his assistant over the cell phone....(hey, what happened to lawyer / client confidentiality ??) and doing it really loud.

    The guy behind him started reading the newspaper at the same decibel level..........LOL!!!!!

    Within 5 seconds the shark was quiet.
  42. Joe B

    Joe B SGF, Supreme Grumble Framer

    I was raised with the words Mr. & Mrs. They are words that, as a young person, shows respect to an older person who has a few more years in this world and deserve the proper respect. That's not to say that everyone older person deserves that respect but I was still taught to give it to them because I don't have that right to judge. I taught both of my children the same.

    IMHO manners and respect start at home. The parents that do not show and teach their children manners and respect are totally at wrong. I have a 120lb daughter that is a police officer in one of the toughest neighborhoods in the Minneapolis suburbs and after 6 years has yet to have a problem because she has learned that everybody, no matter who you are, deserves respect, she first learned that respect at home; needless to say I am very very proud of her. IMO, if you treat a person with respect, they will usually, not always, return the favor.

    Manners are first and foremost taught at home. To this day I say "Yes Sir/Mam" "No Sir/Mam" even to people that are much much younger than my 61 years. Also, I love to open a door for a lady, pull a chair out for my companion, etc.

    Manners are something we learn - today parents, mentors, and adults just don't take the time to teach or show through example how important manners are and shame on all of us for allowing this to happen.

    Ok - enough of my grand standing...

    Joe B
  43. Rick Granick

    Rick Granick SPFG, Supreme Picture Framing God

    Creative solution. And effective.
    :kaffeetrinker_2: Rick
  44. evartpat

    evartpat PFG, Picture Framing God

    OK...I have a cellphone gripe that REALLY takes the cake! :shutup:

    Recently, I was with my husband as he was getting his blood drawn for a test when...the phlebotomist gets a call on her cell. She pauses, answers the phone, then puts it under her chin on her shoulder and holds a conversation on the phone as she continues with her blood draw!!

    Needless to say, I lodged a complaint. :fire:

    The girl was pleasant enough and everything...and drew his blood ok...but come on!!

    Call me old fashioned, but that was a bit much to take!!Regardless of whether it interfered with her abilities or not, to answer a personal call while drawing blood!!! :mad:
  45. shayla

    shayla WOW Framer

    That's blindingly inappropriate behavior, and
    you were so wise to report it. For one thing,
    it's just flat out rude, and for another, it vastly
    increases the likelihood of an error.

    And if she did make an error, you could sue
    the hospital up the ying yang for employee
    negligence. So it's in your interest, and theirs
    and hers to nip this in the bud.

    If you want, I'd be happy to drive down and
    slap her around for ya'.

    What else?

    Oh. I'm so glad I live where I do. True, there
    are some rude folks, but by and large, people
    are still friendly. I'll go to the store or wherever,
    and the employees will thank me or wish me
    a nice day. I'm the same way with folks, and
    it sure does make life sweeter.
  46. neilframer

    neilframer PFG, Picture Framing God

    People seem to forget that somehow we managed to survive for decades and decades without having to be on a telephone every minute.
    The cellphone is a wonderful tool, but I think that soon babies will be born with their hand held to the side of their head.

    Is it really necessary to be on the phone while you're walking your dog, shopping, walking down the street with a child in a stroller, making a left turn without signaling in a dangerous intersection?

    I've seen people drive right through an intersection on a red light without even slowing down, just by luck missing killing someone, and they weren't even aware of the fact that the light was red because they were on their phone.

    I work by a major university and to watch the young students shuffle down the street staring at their cellphones unaware of anything going on around them it's like the zombies in Night of the Living Dead.
  47. Paul N

    Paul N In Corner

    What the...????? This is beyond the pale!! What's next, operating while on their cell phones???

    heck, I don't even let my employee phone and frame at the same time! He can take a break and chatter, but not while framing (....losing a hand would be really great just because of a stupid phone call!)
  48. howdytex

    howdytex MGF, Master Grumble Framer

    at least once a week if not more often i have been asked if was either in the military or an army brat. the answer is always No. so many people are surprised to see someone 26 years old that still shows an outward respect towards others. i am proud to say that may parents instilled good "old fashioned" values in me and i am proud of those values.

    You would be proud of me. self imposed rule i have on myself is unless its an emergency, don't call me while i'm at work. all of my friends, family, and fellow students know this. i do this out of respect for my boss and customers. but by the same token i don't want to be bothered while i'm in class or with my family over work related issues.
  49. neilframer

    neilframer PFG, Picture Framing God

    It's interesting that people are almost shocked if you hold a door open for them or give courtesy to another driver or pedestrian when it used to be no big deal.
  50. shayla

    shayla WOW Framer

    I hold the door open for both men and women,
    and they usually appreciate it. The few I could think
    of who acted odd were women of a certain age who
    assumed I was declaring them feeble and over the
    hill by so doing. LOL....it's not like I offered to refill
    their Geritol prescription.

    People will hold the door for me,
    too, and I always thank them.
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